Today I had the opportunity to hang out with a friend of mine I don't see often, Mike Shepard; or as he's more commonly known, Shaggy.
Shaggs and I talked a bit while we waited for jeff to flake out on the grounds that his mother wasn't jivin with the health thing so much. Perhaps that was true, and perhaps it wasn't. I have my doubts, but no big deal. While Shaggy and I were talkin he asked me again, "when will your Starcross CD be finished!!?" at which point I said "It's a continual work in progress, I won't publish it until it's done, I'm hoping by the end of this year though.
Then shaggy said something I don't think I'll ever for get. He said "In my own experiance as a writer, I've come to realise that there is a point where you simply have to stop revising, or you never make anyting new. If you constantly rework something it looses form after awhile, and just becomes a shadow of what used to be there. It's been a while with my book, so I know how you feel, but man - we KNOW YOU"RE GOOD - JUST FINISH THE DAMNED THING!!! OK????"
Thanks Shaggy. I needed that. I suppose it helped cemment the realizations I've had as of late. My unlocking my first Koan, my constat reanalisys of my friends, my swordsmanship, my distate for my ex girflfriend Kate, and my recent fling with that creature from on yonder, the terror that must not be named, - It just helped validate that I had infact left the crossroads, and that I knew what my path was, or presently is. I guess the wind sorta blew me on the corse I wanted to go, my instinct that I just had to wait for the wind to change, or for the right tide - seems to have been correct. I always felt like I was out of synch with everyone, now I understand why.
Thusly, or perhaps reptrospectively is the best way to put it, my edict for life that I've stuck to for so long seems to have been the ansewer I needed. That being "Don't learn to live, learn how to learn." - That said, next week I'm going to crack open that bloody music theory book of mine, and rememorize the notes on my fret board, memorize every single note in each mode in order, and then I'm going to take chord theory by the horns, and learn chord progression better than I know it now, which will help me put the finishing touches I need for Star Cross. I have all the data I need for the samples, and I've finally found a drum kit sound set that I can work with, and guitar tone set that I like. The research is 95% complete, but now I recognize I can still work at it as I learn that last 5%.
Andrew was right when he said I didn't know how to correctly my own faults. I never bothered to consider that aside from my ever firm grasp on zen as the days go by, there are other sources of knowledge you can still learn a great deal from and apply within a Zen context. For Andrew's insight, and Shaggy's Verbal Kyosaku, along with a strange flashback to my experiance in Tokyo last year, Jon leaving Graveyard, my parents and I on good terms, my sister getting married, my best friend a father, Shaggy married, and everyone else I know for the most part somewhat farther down their own path. I discovered that it wasn't just -them- that had changed, I had progressed, learned, grown, advanced as well - I just didn't realize how far i'd gone, the view hadn't really changed as fast as I thought it would and it threw me for a loop. But t thats not important anymore, the fact is that it happened, and I'm ready to live again. The X Y & Z axis of understanding have finaly all hit a 90 degree angle on a single point, me - I found my bearings, found my triangulation that I needed. I understand where I am now, I understand what I've been doing, which now means i can map out what I want to do, and visually, and mentally see what changes must be done. I suppose this is what they call prajnaparamita - wisdom on the other shore, or satori awakening, - Kensho in a fairly faint sense, nothing so deap as true enlightenment, but I know now I could do it if I so chose.
That said, now I can choose to do anything, and I can succeed at it, not because I'm better than anyone else, but because I understand i have the ability, and facility to use that ability to attain my goals.
Keep your eyes open, because there are a few things bound to come this way that'll be of interest of you. Next stop?
MAITHUNYA-AGARA!!! - BRING IT!!!
Shaggs and I talked a bit while we waited for jeff to flake out on the grounds that his mother wasn't jivin with the health thing so much. Perhaps that was true, and perhaps it wasn't. I have my doubts, but no big deal. While Shaggy and I were talkin he asked me again, "when will your Starcross CD be finished!!?" at which point I said "It's a continual work in progress, I won't publish it until it's done, I'm hoping by the end of this year though.
Then shaggy said something I don't think I'll ever for get. He said "In my own experiance as a writer, I've come to realise that there is a point where you simply have to stop revising, or you never make anyting new. If you constantly rework something it looses form after awhile, and just becomes a shadow of what used to be there. It's been a while with my book, so I know how you feel, but man - we KNOW YOU"RE GOOD - JUST FINISH THE DAMNED THING!!! OK????"
Thanks Shaggy. I needed that. I suppose it helped cemment the realizations I've had as of late. My unlocking my first Koan, my constat reanalisys of my friends, my swordsmanship, my distate for my ex girflfriend Kate, and my recent fling with that creature from on yonder, the terror that must not be named, - It just helped validate that I had infact left the crossroads, and that I knew what my path was, or presently is. I guess the wind sorta blew me on the corse I wanted to go, my instinct that I just had to wait for the wind to change, or for the right tide - seems to have been correct. I always felt like I was out of synch with everyone, now I understand why.
Thusly, or perhaps reptrospectively is the best way to put it, my edict for life that I've stuck to for so long seems to have been the ansewer I needed. That being "Don't learn to live, learn how to learn." - That said, next week I'm going to crack open that bloody music theory book of mine, and rememorize the notes on my fret board, memorize every single note in each mode in order, and then I'm going to take chord theory by the horns, and learn chord progression better than I know it now, which will help me put the finishing touches I need for Star Cross. I have all the data I need for the samples, and I've finally found a drum kit sound set that I can work with, and guitar tone set that I like. The research is 95% complete, but now I recognize I can still work at it as I learn that last 5%.
Andrew was right when he said I didn't know how to correctly my own faults. I never bothered to consider that aside from my ever firm grasp on zen as the days go by, there are other sources of knowledge you can still learn a great deal from and apply within a Zen context. For Andrew's insight, and Shaggy's Verbal Kyosaku, along with a strange flashback to my experiance in Tokyo last year, Jon leaving Graveyard, my parents and I on good terms, my sister getting married, my best friend a father, Shaggy married, and everyone else I know for the most part somewhat farther down their own path. I discovered that it wasn't just -them- that had changed, I had progressed, learned, grown, advanced as well - I just didn't realize how far i'd gone, the view hadn't really changed as fast as I thought it would and it threw me for a loop. But t thats not important anymore, the fact is that it happened, and I'm ready to live again. The X Y & Z axis of understanding have finaly all hit a 90 degree angle on a single point, me - I found my bearings, found my triangulation that I needed. I understand where I am now, I understand what I've been doing, which now means i can map out what I want to do, and visually, and mentally see what changes must be done. I suppose this is what they call prajnaparamita - wisdom on the other shore, or satori awakening, - Kensho in a fairly faint sense, nothing so deap as true enlightenment, but I know now I could do it if I so chose.
That said, now I can choose to do anything, and I can succeed at it, not because I'm better than anyone else, but because I understand i have the ability, and facility to use that ability to attain my goals.
Keep your eyes open, because there are a few things bound to come this way that'll be of interest of you. Next stop?
MAITHUNYA-AGARA!!! - BRING IT!!!
posted by Renge at 6/14/2003 04:42:00 AM
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